Many times people think that when they begin a relationship with Christ that everything will be great in life. There are preachers who even teach this mentality when it is not correct according to the Bible. This subject has really been hitting home to me lately because I see people in the church who are struggling and they think it is a bad thing or something is wrong.
Christ addressed this issue when he spoke in John 16:33 Christ says I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” Christ did not say that you will have peace with Him and the world he said you will have peace with Him but in the world you will have tribulation. Christ was preparing the disciples here for a time that was coming up shortly where he would no longer be in there presence. While the disciples were in the presence of Christ on earth we seen them witness miracles from water turning into wine,the feeding of the 5,000,demons cast out,people healed and even being raised from the dead. While all this was happening Christ along with the disciples were having to deal with the struggles of this world. In Matthew 17:24-27 we see that Christ had to order Peter to get a mite out of a fishes mouth in order to pay a tax. If Christ and the disciples were doing so great financially do you think they would have had to get the tax out of a fishes mouth and not out of there pockets? We see later on that what Christ tells a man the cost of following Him will look like “Foxes have holes, and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay his head.” Luke 9:58 If Christ who is the Son of God had no where to sleep what would that tell you and I about life here on earth would be for us if we are to follow in His footsteps. We are not promised on this earth a life of plenty or great things. We see through out the old testament and the new testament God gives His people what they need and not necessarily there wants. Sure there are times God blesses us with what we want and beyond what we could imagine but the thing I can say from personal experience is often the things we want are not what is best for us. If life was great and I had everything I ever wanted beyond what I needed I would have no need to rely on Christ. It is during the times of struggles and heartaches that I find myself drawing closer to God relying on Him for strength and comfort. There is coming a day very soon when all the struggles we are going through on earth whether it be poverty,health,loneliness, and even persecution we will be rewarded beyond our wildest imaginations. We will be up in Heaven on streets of gold where there will be no more poverty,health issues,loneliness and persecution. We will be up in Heaven with the God who created the heavens and the earth and we will want nothing more than that! All those things that bring us pain in suffering here will be bound up and in the pit of hell far away from where we will be. Revelations 21:4 "He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.” My scripture reading for today really hit home to me because I have found myself recently doing things my way and not the way God would have them. Even though what I was doing was not necessarily bad I was still doing it my way and with my strength and not Gods strength.
Acts 8:9-13 (ESV) 9 But there was a man named Simon, who had previously practiced magic in the city and amazed the people of Samaria, saying that he himself was somebody great. 10 They all paid attention to him, from the least to the greatest, saying, “This man is the power of God that is called Great.” 11 And they paid attention to him because for a long time he had amazed them with his magic. 12 But when they believed Philip as he preached good news about the kingdom of God and the name of Jesus Christ, they were baptized, both men and women. 13 Even Simon himself believed, and after being baptized he continued with Philip. And seeing signs and great miracles[a] performed, he was amazed. In Acts 8:9-13 I see an interesting transformation take place. It reads that a magician named Simon who practiced amazing magic in Samaria. Simon himself even told the people that he had power from God and it was called “Great”. Interesting here is because Simon had such influence over the people because of the magic he performed in the past that the people were believing him. We see that Philip comes on the scene preaching the good news about the kingdom of God and in the name of Jesus. When he does this we see that many men and women are baptized and even Simon the “great” magician believed and was baptized. Simon then followed Philip and seeing him do many wonderful signs and miracles and the most ironic thing it says that Simon was amazed (v.13) This shows me how influential “church”people who live in the world can be. If you do things that are different and seem impossible people look up to you and they put you on a pedestal when in fact you are no different than them. It does not matter how big of a person you make yourself out to be and if you believe it with all your heart you are still a sinner who needs repentance and Christ as your savior. We see later in Acts 9 that Paul (formerly Saul who persecuted the Christians and people like Philip) who was doing “Great Things” in the "name" of God (what the Pharisees leaders said) and yet he was still lost and in need of a savior. It took Saul on the road to Damascus to be blinded and have his eyes open to the truth before he could actually do the "Great Things" that God wanted done and not what the Pharisee leaders wanted. That was proclaiming the name of Christ to everyone. We see that because of this Paul became a marked man and was hunted for his new-found belief. If you expect God to do great things through you the thing that needs to happen is that God is actually doing it and not you yourself. No matter how much you try to do in the name of Christ, whether it be teaching a class in church or taking care of the elderly and even telling others about Christ in the streets; If you do not do it with the power of God all you are doing is in vain. When we become children of God we no longer live like we did in the past but we live by faith in the Son of God. Galatians 2:20(ESV) I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.
September 21,2016 is a day that I will never forget. This day started off like any other day. My wife was working on her woodwork as I was working on media for Church. I will never forget hearing my phone ring and seeing it was from my one older brother who still lives back in Ohio. At first I thought that is weird he never calls. Then I got a sinking feeling it was a call about my Father,who had been sick for some time. I will never forget answering the phone and hearing my brother crying. He said he had some bad news. I said Dads gone isn't he. After all I have been preparing myself that my father was not going to get better. He said no its not Dad. I said Grandma? He said no its Mom. She had died in a car accident! I will never forget the feeling of pain and agony I felt. I must have been loud in my reaction because my wife came running in and she said is it your Dad? I said no it was Mom. I wept bitterly and told my brother I would contact my other brother who lives near me and I broke the news to him as well.
It was right after that I remember going into my prayer closet, and I was crying out to God... " I WANT TO BE MAD AT YOU!!! I WANT TO HATE YOU!!! BUT I CAN'T!! I told God I know Your Son died when He didn't deserve it! He died a death that was not His! He died for me and for my sin and for my mother! And because of that I remember telling God that "because of all Christ went through I know I will see her again" I thanked Him through the tears. As a young child we grew up in church. We were in the doors every time they were open. I remember watching my mother sing in choir along side my Grandmother. They both loved to sing! I can still hear my mother singing. After Mom would get done in choir she would come sit down and I remember as a child leaning up against her while the Pastor preached. I can still smell the Kleenex Mom would give us to blow our noses with in Church. My parents prayed that all their kids would have a relationship with Christ that is why they put us in Christian education so that we would have all the tools we needed. But like allot of children as they grow older they tend to go against what they were told and raised to be. After high school unless you would have known me growing up you would not have known I grew up in a christian home. I was living in the world doing things I should not do. I began to grow bitter and angry at God and I was living a lifestyle I should not live,but through all that my mother never stopped praying for me and her other children. I will never forget when I made the decision to join the Army I sat my parents down on the couch and handed them a bumper sticker that said "My Son Is A Proud Member Of The U.S. Army". You see no one had a clue I was even thinking about joining. My parents first reaction was HOW LONG DID YOU SIGN UP FOR!!! I told them 4 years. They said "4 years don't you know you could sign up for less!" (That still makes me laugh) Even then like most good mothers are my Mom supported my decision and it was hard to watch me go but they were there for me. It was during my deployment that my anger and hate towards God had began to climax. I remember telling God if your such a good God why would you let this happen to these innocent children over here. (I supported the war but did not like what it was causing to the innocent) I will never forget when I returned from being deployed to Iraq in 2004 my parents were there waiting there for me along with my then girlfriend and now my wife. I remember my mother had tears in her eyes and giving me the biggest hug I believe she has ever given me. It was later that I found out from my Father that my Mother was glued to the t.v. everyday while I was deployed watching the news and praying for me. Well after I ended my service in Army I was already married and had my first born on the way. It was during this time my mothers health had started to decline. She had a disease that caused her tremendous pain in her arm and she was also loosing her sight. It was hard for her to make out things like she use to. I remember talking to her on phone and her saying she was praying that God would give her sight back to see my son born. Well wouldn't you know my mothers site came back good enough to see my son. She still had the pain in arm and I remember my 3 day old son in her arms and his little handing holding her finger and she was in so much pain and had tears of pain yet she did not want to put him down. MOMS PRAYERS WERE ANSWERED! Life had gone on and my mothers health had gotten better, and the pain was not there and her sight was good again. She and my father loved to travel and they would get in the van and go wherever they could. By the time my second son was born and she was there to see him with no problem. Moms health was doing pretty good. They would come down and visit in TN and we would go up there to Ohio and visit as well. I was working and taking care of my family but I still had a hate and anger towards God that was starting to diminish and I was beginning to fear my past decisions about my attitude towards God. My wife would get me to go to Church once a year if she was lucky and when I would go I would get so uneasy and wanted to get out as quick as I went in. 2011 was one of the hardest years of my life. It was the year I quit drinking and in July we were in Ohio visiting my parents when I had noticed my leg had started to swell and it was starting to seep fluid. I showed my wife and she said we needed to get back to TN and go to the Doctor. We cut our trip short and headed back home and next day went to the Doctor where they diagnosed that I had a blood clot in my leg and I was not able to work. It was during this time my mental health had not been good since I quit drinking and everything snowballed from my past all at once. I had gained 1oo lbs like it was nothing due to pain in leg and my chronic neck and back pain was getting worst and I was unable to do things like I could before. Everything was starting to go dark. I will never forget the day I told my wife to take the kids and go. I was going to end my life! I could not handle it no more. I had no hope in anything anymore...that is until all I could do is look up and here God say"Have you had enough yet? Come home!" All I could do is look up to God at my absolute lowest and see God. God had to take me down to rock bottom to see Him and I am glad He did. I found Salvation in Christ. The prodigal son had come home. I am also glad that my Mom never stopped praying for me. Through my life of sin Mom had a love that never failed. She modeled her life after Christ and it was evident by how she lived and prayed. Because of her prayers I now have salvation in Christ! Because of her prayers I am involved in church like I never thought I would be! It was because of her prayers that I had the strength and honor to speak at her funeral to tell family and friends about the reason the way Mom was who she was because she was being an imitator of Christ. She could not help but love us kids and so many others because she had so much of the love of Christ in her that is was flowing out of her! It was also because of her prayers that a couple weeks after her funeral I was on a plane to Guatemala with my church. I was there sharing my Mothers testimony and how she modeled her life after Christ. If my Mom did not have a love for Christ and did not pray for me I would not be where I am today. I would not be actively serving in my church in anyway I can. I would not be going to Guatemala again. My Moms prayers are still being answered 235 days and counting since she passed from this life of sin and pain to a ETERNAL life with Christ. She is where I want to be...Let me rephrase that she is where I will be one day all because she never stopped praying for me. I LOVE YOU MOM AND SEE YOU SOON! 20 let him know that whoever brings back a sinner from his wandering will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins. James 5:20 |